Collateral Damage

In the wake of arguably one of the biggest storms (for us) in over 20 years, people ask questions. Why did this happen? Where was God when this storm came? What was He doing, doesn't He love us? And while we watch the newscasts in terror, realizing the lives lost, we wonder.

If you're like me, my stomach clenches and turns when I hear about the lives lost... the children they're pulling out of the ditches in Ringgold, the death toll steadily rising... And something inside of me screams out "NO! This isn't RIGHT!"


I think its important to acknowledge a few things...

First off - What happens in the wake of a tragedy is beautiful. I have had my phone lighting up all day. People I haven't heard from in years (literally) called me, texted or Facebooked this morning to check and see how I was. I found myself doing the same - calling people in the area to check on them, make sure they were all right. People reach out beyond themselves and compassion shows up in a big way. They give, they volunteer, they open shelters and provide food -- they take care of people who need it. People stop being so selfish and - for a day or so - honestly inquire about the needs and well being of others.

Secondly - We thank God it missed us. Or, we thank God for the help that's been given since it hit us. Whatever. We acknowledge the One who is in control. We accept that Someone bigger than us is at work in the universe. Things like this serve me with a wake up call. "Hello? Do you realize you were 5 miles down the road from the worst of it?" "Wow, God, you're awesome. Thanks for protecting us!"

So - The question at hand is "Does God love you?"

The pre-programed answer is "yes, of course." We're taught that as small as we can learn to sing the song "yes, Jesus loves me." But let me ask you - Do you REALLY believe that God loves you? Is it past your brain and down in your gut?

If the answer to that is yes, you already know what God is doing, or at least that what He's doing is good. That doesn't mean its easy or makes sense, it just means that you know.

If you can't answer that... Honestly? that's okay. It takes time to really know what you believe about God. When I was 16 - even after I'd been raised in the church my whole life and had firmly rooted belief about God - I found myself realizing that God was not who I thought He was. I'd been taught that God is judgmental since He is perfect and can't bear sin. And basically that Jesus saved the day and saved us from eternal damnation that the Father was going to put on us. And while, more or less, some of that is true I entirely missed the real nature of God. God - Father, Son and Holy Spirit - loves you. God wants the best for you. And in spite of what anyone says (ex: this is punishment for your sin, this is what you deserve, whatever) God doesn't want death and pain for us.


In line with my belief about God and what I know of His personality, I attest that God did not cause the tornadoes, but rather, allowed them to happen in order to let His good come out of all of it. But let me ask you -- if God did cause the tornadoes, do you really believe anything changes? Does God not love you because he uses natural disasters to change things? This is a good opportunity to really examine yourself and ask yourself -- Does God really love me?

Survival Instinct

Pain is much like childbirth. Now, my experiences with childbirth have all been natural, so I'm not really sure what its like when you have medication. Anyway,

When you are in labor, the point right before you are allowed to start pushing is the most painful that labor gets. The combination of pressure and pain is overwhelming. Your body takes over and you have to let your mind and emotions slip back into a coma-like state for a short period just to make it through. You fully believe you are going to die, that something's gone wrong, that you are never going to deliver this baby -- because it hurts so much. And your body kicks in and pushes your brain back and focuses your energy on bringing that baby into the world. There is something that changes in a woman during that much pain -- its hard to describe as anything other than a survival instinct. Basically, your body knows that to live it has to deliver this baby. And if you don't, you and that baby will possibly die. And it takes over and does what it needs to do.

A similar picture would be instances in movies that are repeated by action films and dramas alike. There is a point that you fully believe that the hero is going to die. He's taken a few gunshots, he is bleeding profusely, he can hardly stand and he's holding his guts in with his free hand. The hero slides across the floor as the villan laughs, about to kill his (best friend, daughter, wife, whatever) and the camera angle shifts and suddenly you see that hero stand up and shoot the villan. The villan dies and the hero falls over and passes out from the sheer effort. Its a survival instinct - its that thing inside you that says "if I don't do this, we're all gonna die." It surpasses your pain and your ability and taps into a hidden reserve just long enough to get it done.

Pain is something we all face. Alot of situations get worse and worse until we just can't stand it anymore and we're doing all we can do to get up in the morning and remember to take a shower or feed the dog before we leave for work. Things slip - you forget to haul off the trash, you forget to pay the bills, you don't have the energy to mow the lawn - but you're doing your absolute best because life is so much, so painful, that you've tapped into that hidden reserve to make it through until things get better. You're surviving.

God gave us that hidden reserve and that ability to distance ourselves as a protective mechanism from occasional things that happen that really are just too much. But many times we stay in survival mode and we never step back into the fullness that life is meant to be. You make plenty of money at your new job but you're still always stressed out that last few days before payday. You're out of that bad relationship but it still frightens you when you pass a car like the one he drives. You are stuck surviving because that's what you've been doing for so long. You go to church on Sunday morning and pray for Christ to return soon because you don't know how much longer you can take all this corruption in the school system.

God wants us to remember that life isn't about surviving. We are warriors. And sometimes, warriors survive. But warriors that only survive aren't called warriors -- they're called survivors. Warriors go out against the battle and fight back. So your financial life is upside down - actively look for a resolution, don't lie down and cry about it. Your out of a bad relationship - good! Move on! You hate the teacher that told your child God was a myth for old fogies -- tell them that you don't want them instilling those teachings in your child and change teachers or schools if needbe!

Don't just survive -- Go out there and take back our territory!

Cry it Out

Something about teaching Judah to go to bed in his own bed has struck a chord within me. I wonder about how often we get into situations that God has to let us "cry it out"

The cry it out method is a method parents use when they've tried all the nice ways to put their kid down to bed (something he needs) and none of the easy ways worked. This method is generally a last resort for parents - its not what you want to do but your precious little one has just taxed the daylights out of your right mind. You don't know what else to try. He just has to cry it out and go to sleep.

As a parent of 3 children, I know this method works but its really a tough thing to do. In the process of teaching your child how to go to sleep, if you're like me, you turn the music up in the other room and put your head under a pillow, or you step outside just so you don't go and pick up the little one. He'll never learn to sleep on his own if he knows you'll come and get him if he cries hard and long enough.

Its not that you don't love your baby. Its not that you aren't worried about him, listening to make sure he isn't actually in need of something. In fact, part of the method involves making sure all his needs are met before you put him down. But there comes a time and a place that you just have to grind your teeth and suck it up and put that baby down.

God is illustrated as a Father again and again throughout the bible. And tonight, as I struggle to discipline my children in love, I wonder about how many times He has to let me cry it out.