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Thursday, December 1, 2011
Sunday, October 16, 2011
Worth Keeping
As a District Manager, its my job to make the hard decisions of disciplinary action. And, over the last 2 months, I've had to let someone go, do a few write ups, and choose when to do what. Of course, my decisions are impacted and directed by my supervisor and the owner of the company, but when it comes down to it, I'm the one who has to do the dirty work. They tell me what to do, and I execute.
Something I have quickly learned is the huge difference between an employee you want to keep and one that you don't. Let me explain:
An employee that has not been productive, is late, has drama follow them around, and is more trouble than they are worth, is very likely to be the one that you terminate when they make a mistake that's on the line between maybe and absolutely. I had one such employee recently that made a decision that could have been handled with a write up, or could've been a cause for termination. And, when it came to it, she was fired. Why? She hadn't made herself valuable enough to the company to let her slide by on a write up. When it gets to that point, business owners are waiting for a good reason to get rid of someone.
An employee that is productive, is timely, is consistent, dependable, pleasant and responsible becomes someone you want to keep. And when they make a fatal mistake that could go either way, you opt to keep them. And, even though termination has been threatened for such a mistake, you let them go on a write up. It has nothing to do with which employee you life better or who you have a better personal connection with. It all comes down to who is more valuable to you.
When you pursue your calling, you will be one of these two employees. Now, God won't fire you from your calling, but depending on how reliable and consistent you are, He will give you more or less responsibilities. For me, its simplest to explain this in the role of a prophet. In church, God taps you on the shoulder and says "go, tell the pastor that I say that I have a whole field of goats for him." And you think 'ok that's crazy, but its worth a shot' and you do it. The pastor is overwhelmed because that meant something to him, and you did your job well. So God adds to your responsibility and gives you a word for the woman at the supermarket. He says 'tell that woman that her son is way better than George Clooney.' You decide not to say anything, because its out of context and insane. But here's the thing - that lady needed to hear it! So, He sends someone else on assignment, some other time, to say something that means the same thing to her.
You see, its not you that makes the difference, its God using you as an instrument. In fact, if you are ever praying with a group of prophets, you will (many times) have 2 or 3 of them start in to say the same thing at the same time. There have been times I've been at a prayer meeting and I wait to say something and then I hear another prophet say EXACTLY what I was about to say.
God will accomplish His works regardless of if you are on board or not. So, it comes down to this: Do you want the job? If you want the job, then do what He tells you to, as soon as He tells you to do it. If you do, He will give you more responsibility and use you more frequently because you have made yourself valuable to Him as a prophet (or pastor or teacher or whatever). If you choose not to, He will always have that door open for you, but He won't use you nearly as frequently because He wants to get the job done. You make your talents as a prophet (pastor, teacher, etc) replaceable. Now, don't get me wrong, you can do what He tells you to do better than anyone else can. There's a reason He told you to do it first. But, if you don't listen, He will get someone else to do it.
While I'm Waiting
Sometimes, I feel like I'm barely able to tread water anymore. I feel like its all I can do to gasp for air between falling back beneath the surface, doing all I can do to stay alive. Its like I can't catch a break, I can't get enough strength mustered up to swim to safety, but I haven't quite given up and decided to die.
Life is entirely this way for me, more times than not. And I am confident that everyone has felt this way at one point or another. Those times that you sit back from circumstances and say "Really, Lord? Are you done yet?" And maybe that's selfish and childish but let's face it, we've all been there.
Maturity is when you come to those points and decide to grit your teeth and walk through it anyway. It is a character defining moment when you step back and look at how badly life stinks and choose to deal with it anyway. If you're like me, I don't always want to be mature. I don't want to muster up the strength to swim back up to the surface and gasp another breath and continue fighting. I'd rather just let go and give up, curl up and feel sorry for myself. There are points that I get angry with God and tell Him to take a hike and to let me be - that I've had enough of His plan and I'll just do things my own way. And then, a few days later, I come back, humbled, and admit I really do need His help to make it through.
The thing is that God doesn't expect us to handle our life without occasionally feeling down and out. He realizes what we're going through, He understands because He's been there personally and has experienced it. And while that may not make you feel any better, it is true. And for me? Its a big deal to know that its okay for me to be mad and frustrated with the process. The process of getting to wherever it is that you're going is guaranteed to be the most difficult process that you will ever face. And if you're pursuing your true calling, its absolutely going to be as tough as it gets.
Take it as encouragement, take it as a wake-up call, whatever you want to call it - its all just truth. If you're having a tough time, then you're heading the right way. Whats the hardest part of heading the right way? Going anyways, knowing you're going to keep getting beat down. That's maturity, and that's following God. He didn't say to pick up your picnic basket and follow Him. A cross is a heavy thing, that's painful to carry, and is downright impossible feeling at times. No one promised this would be skipping through the flower fields, but somehow we've all got it in our heads that things shouldn't be so hard. We're fighting a whole myriad of things - evil forces, ourselves, other people, bloodlines, etc etc etc, and those are all going to just make it harder.
I guess what I'm saying is that God knows its hard, but He picked the right person for the job and you absolutely have the ability and potential to fulfill your calling, no matter how hard it is while you're waiting to finish line.
Sunday, August 14, 2011
In the Process
This week has been interesting and the entire week I feel has been a lesson in faith, so I want to share about it.
Beginning last week, we took our family vacation to Charleston to see my family. We left Tuesday afternoon and spent a wonderful week with my parents and siblings. It was great. On the way home, trouble started.
Sunday evening we were on our way home and our van broke down in Atlanta. I was driving, and it turned off. That simple. No ifs ands or buts, it was done. (We found out later it was a master fuse that was worn out from all the fuel pump issues we'd had and finally blew). There we sat, on the curb of a highway just off of interstate 75 northbound, trying to figure out what to do. We knew we didn't have $200+ to get a taxi or a tow all the way home. Alina was freaking out. Somehow in the midst of it all, God convinced me to make it a teaching moment and tell Alina that God was taking care of us, and we would be okay. She looked up at me with innocent little eyes and asked if I was sure. I said yes.
At that moment, I threw up a prayer that God wouldn't make me a liar. Silly as it seems, I was totally at a loss for what we were to do. Then a pizza delivery man came over and offered to take us to a hotel. I called in to work for Monday since we were stuck in Atlanta, and we took the ride. My mom provided the hotel room payment and we settled in for the night. As we were tucking in to bed, Alina looked at me and smiled "I knew God would take care of us." God had provided.
Monday morning, we called our usual mechanic (still at a loss for how we were getting home, how we were getting the car home, how we were doing anything) and asked if they knew what we needed to do to fix it. Instead of telling Brent what to look at or how to fix it, they borrowed a 8 seated SUV and came and got us, and towed the van back to Cohutta where they had it fixed by that evening. God provided.
Tuesday morning I went to work where I had a very unpleasant experience and spent 45 minutes being yelled at for something I had nothing to do with. It was in that moment that I realized it was time to find a new job. I held my tongue, asked for the day off to consider things, and called my previous employer (Sprint). Wednesday morning I was fired for the same reasons that they fabricated the previous day. I went home a total mess, emotional to the max, hoping against all desperation that God would provide. He did.
And today, Sunday, I was sitting on my bed talking to my husband about starting work. Since my previous employer hadn't paid the check I was due, we were trying to figure out how to afford the gas to work the job I am starting Monday. And its funny to me that I was stressed about it - because fact of the matter is that God has provided significantly and supernaturally all week, and the next week would be no exception.
Its not the fact that we understand that God will provide that makes us, its the faith in the process that defines character.
Beginning last week, we took our family vacation to Charleston to see my family. We left Tuesday afternoon and spent a wonderful week with my parents and siblings. It was great. On the way home, trouble started.
Sunday evening we were on our way home and our van broke down in Atlanta. I was driving, and it turned off. That simple. No ifs ands or buts, it was done. (We found out later it was a master fuse that was worn out from all the fuel pump issues we'd had and finally blew). There we sat, on the curb of a highway just off of interstate 75 northbound, trying to figure out what to do. We knew we didn't have $200+ to get a taxi or a tow all the way home. Alina was freaking out. Somehow in the midst of it all, God convinced me to make it a teaching moment and tell Alina that God was taking care of us, and we would be okay. She looked up at me with innocent little eyes and asked if I was sure. I said yes.
At that moment, I threw up a prayer that God wouldn't make me a liar. Silly as it seems, I was totally at a loss for what we were to do. Then a pizza delivery man came over and offered to take us to a hotel. I called in to work for Monday since we were stuck in Atlanta, and we took the ride. My mom provided the hotel room payment and we settled in for the night. As we were tucking in to bed, Alina looked at me and smiled "I knew God would take care of us." God had provided.
Monday morning, we called our usual mechanic (still at a loss for how we were getting home, how we were getting the car home, how we were doing anything) and asked if they knew what we needed to do to fix it. Instead of telling Brent what to look at or how to fix it, they borrowed a 8 seated SUV and came and got us, and towed the van back to Cohutta where they had it fixed by that evening. God provided.
Tuesday morning I went to work where I had a very unpleasant experience and spent 45 minutes being yelled at for something I had nothing to do with. It was in that moment that I realized it was time to find a new job. I held my tongue, asked for the day off to consider things, and called my previous employer (Sprint). Wednesday morning I was fired for the same reasons that they fabricated the previous day. I went home a total mess, emotional to the max, hoping against all desperation that God would provide. He did.
And today, Sunday, I was sitting on my bed talking to my husband about starting work. Since my previous employer hadn't paid the check I was due, we were trying to figure out how to afford the gas to work the job I am starting Monday. And its funny to me that I was stressed about it - because fact of the matter is that God has provided significantly and supernaturally all week, and the next week would be no exception.
Its not the fact that we understand that God will provide that makes us, its the faith in the process that defines character.
Thursday, July 28, 2011
Worry
This week, the democrats and republicans have been debating a bunch of stuff about the country debt, etc etc. I haven't been too worried about it or too involved, but my boss has. He is purposefully not purchasing things, waiting on lots of things, and holding his breath to see if the world falls apart on August 2nd. About a week ago, he mentioned to me his concerns and I told him I wasn't worried about it. He thought I may be crazy, and after a conversation about how I believed we would be fine, he decided I was, indeed, crazy. But while he considers transferring his money into Euro, I have faith that we will be okay.
Last night, Brent and I walked across the street to see his family. His mother had said they needed to tell us something about Becca. Instantly, worry sets in - Rebecca is Brent's 18 year old sister who has spina bifida and had total kidney failure a bit over a year ago. If they wanted to talk about Becca, it could be serious. As we were walking up the driveway, I asked if he was concerned. Brent said there was no use in getting all upset about what could be happening, or what I imagine they may tell us. It could be good news - she could be getting a kidney. You never know. Then he told me that he doesn't freak about things like I do.
Its funny to me that in some situations its so easy to remain calm and not worried about it - especially because I have no control over it. Something like the national debt is beyond me - even if I donated every penny of my paycheck and didn't feed my children or pay my bills for a year, it wouldn't even take a shot at the problem that exists. But other things, like Rebecca's health that I have equally little control over gets me upset and stressed. Both things have potential to impact me equally in different ways - but one got me worried and the other didn't.
I guess this is why Jesus says not to worry about anything. He doesn't say "don't worry about money" or "don't worry about your health" -- he said don't worry about anything. This is a tough thing to do but it puts things into perspective. Just when I thought I was doing well on the worry things, something close to me pops up and I'm flat on my back. We need to learn to trust Jesus with everything and consider everything in our prayers and supplications, not just the things that bother us. And we need to learn compassion for others in their prayers, to consider things with them and not just brush off their concerns because its not something that worries you.
Last night, Brent and I walked across the street to see his family. His mother had said they needed to tell us something about Becca. Instantly, worry sets in - Rebecca is Brent's 18 year old sister who has spina bifida and had total kidney failure a bit over a year ago. If they wanted to talk about Becca, it could be serious. As we were walking up the driveway, I asked if he was concerned. Brent said there was no use in getting all upset about what could be happening, or what I imagine they may tell us. It could be good news - she could be getting a kidney. You never know. Then he told me that he doesn't freak about things like I do.
Its funny to me that in some situations its so easy to remain calm and not worried about it - especially because I have no control over it. Something like the national debt is beyond me - even if I donated every penny of my paycheck and didn't feed my children or pay my bills for a year, it wouldn't even take a shot at the problem that exists. But other things, like Rebecca's health that I have equally little control over gets me upset and stressed. Both things have potential to impact me equally in different ways - but one got me worried and the other didn't.
I guess this is why Jesus says not to worry about anything. He doesn't say "don't worry about money" or "don't worry about your health" -- he said don't worry about anything. This is a tough thing to do but it puts things into perspective. Just when I thought I was doing well on the worry things, something close to me pops up and I'm flat on my back. We need to learn to trust Jesus with everything and consider everything in our prayers and supplications, not just the things that bother us. And we need to learn compassion for others in their prayers, to consider things with them and not just brush off their concerns because its not something that worries you.
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Discouraged
Sometimes your best isn't good enough. Sometimes you give everything you can, put all your effort and energy into something, and its just not good enough.
For example, I feel this way at my job frequently. I put forth all I can and I am still required to come early, stay late, and work extra because there is more to be done.
Sometimes expectations are just too high. Sometimes your expectations of yourself are too low.
We got a new puppy this week - a boxer/rottweiler mix who's about 6 weeks old. And this puppy knows nothing of me or my personality or how I'm going to treat him but he loves me anyway. He isn't disapointed with my inability to pay for the top dog food brand, he is fine with ol roy, the cheapo Walmart brand. And he doesn't mind that he doesn't have a fancy kennel yet because I know he's going to get big fast - he is okay with his little cardboard box. He is content to sit in my lap and be petted and loved on.
Sometimes I wish I could just curl up and be patted like he does. But being a human, especially and adult, is much harder than being a puppy.
I guess what I'm getting at is that God loves us regardless of what we do or what we can afford. It doesn't matter what we do, it doesn't matter if our best doesn't get the job done - none of that matters to Him. What matters is we try and we love Him.
I wish sometimes people were more like my puppy, and more like God. Its so hard to find unconditional love. Its one of those things that humans simply do not understand. Loving someone regardless of how stupid they are, how many times they screw up, or how they don't live up to your expectations --- that's how God loves you.
For example, I feel this way at my job frequently. I put forth all I can and I am still required to come early, stay late, and work extra because there is more to be done.
Sometimes expectations are just too high. Sometimes your expectations of yourself are too low.
We got a new puppy this week - a boxer/rottweiler mix who's about 6 weeks old. And this puppy knows nothing of me or my personality or how I'm going to treat him but he loves me anyway. He isn't disapointed with my inability to pay for the top dog food brand, he is fine with ol roy, the cheapo Walmart brand. And he doesn't mind that he doesn't have a fancy kennel yet because I know he's going to get big fast - he is okay with his little cardboard box. He is content to sit in my lap and be petted and loved on.
Sometimes I wish I could just curl up and be patted like he does. But being a human, especially and adult, is much harder than being a puppy.
I guess what I'm getting at is that God loves us regardless of what we do or what we can afford. It doesn't matter what we do, it doesn't matter if our best doesn't get the job done - none of that matters to Him. What matters is we try and we love Him.
I wish sometimes people were more like my puppy, and more like God. Its so hard to find unconditional love. Its one of those things that humans simply do not understand. Loving someone regardless of how stupid they are, how many times they screw up, or how they don't live up to your expectations --- that's how God loves you.
Monday, July 25, 2011
Measure of Success
So we poured all our blood sweat and tears into our first show and had not nearly as many people as we'd hoped show up. And its pretty easy to get discouraged after something like that. Brent and I stopped and talked about it some, and its something you have to choose to do or not do -- choose to eat from the tree of life or from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.
When we try to measure things and their success by our own knowledge and our own ability to see and comprehend, we just screw things up. Sure, it may not look like we made any progress, we certainly didn't make any money, but is that what God was trying to achieve? Or was He doing something bigger and greater than my finances?
A few details about the show:
1) Before our first performance, the cast stood in the alley and prayed together. As a cast, our beliefs varied a bit, but when Brent and I asked if anyone wanted to come pray with us, everyone came (except Abigail who was manning the front doors).
2) Although not many people physically came to the show, there was alot of support from the community, and alot of contacts were made. People who want to help on the next show, and in anything we do in the future. Writers, crew, directors - people we need to have a successful company.
3) Collectively, as a cast, we agreed that the show had alot standing against it in spiritual realms. We had attack after attack -- having to re-cast 2 major roles 4 weeks from curtain, having difficulty learning lines, stress, sickness, exhaustion, extra work at our jobs, the sudden death of a close friend, etc etc etc. It was terribly discouraging to sit backstage and see only a handful of folks in the audience. But we got out there and gave a fantastic show anyway.
Looking at it all like this helps me understand that God MUST be doing something greater here than we can see. There's no way that Satan would go through all that nonsense if God wasn't planning something big. So this weekend may not have been a success monetarily, but we know that there was a great spiritual breaking in the process of the weekend. And there's no way God would've given us all the help He did if He wasn't fighting for it too.
Eating from the Tree of Life is acknowledging God is doing something bigger than you. It's hard to look at it this way, for sure, but if you can adjust your mindset just a bit, great things are happening under the surface.
When we try to measure things and their success by our own knowledge and our own ability to see and comprehend, we just screw things up. Sure, it may not look like we made any progress, we certainly didn't make any money, but is that what God was trying to achieve? Or was He doing something bigger and greater than my finances?
A few details about the show:
1) Before our first performance, the cast stood in the alley and prayed together. As a cast, our beliefs varied a bit, but when Brent and I asked if anyone wanted to come pray with us, everyone came (except Abigail who was manning the front doors).
2) Although not many people physically came to the show, there was alot of support from the community, and alot of contacts were made. People who want to help on the next show, and in anything we do in the future. Writers, crew, directors - people we need to have a successful company.
3) Collectively, as a cast, we agreed that the show had alot standing against it in spiritual realms. We had attack after attack -- having to re-cast 2 major roles 4 weeks from curtain, having difficulty learning lines, stress, sickness, exhaustion, extra work at our jobs, the sudden death of a close friend, etc etc etc. It was terribly discouraging to sit backstage and see only a handful of folks in the audience. But we got out there and gave a fantastic show anyway.
Looking at it all like this helps me understand that God MUST be doing something greater here than we can see. There's no way that Satan would go through all that nonsense if God wasn't planning something big. So this weekend may not have been a success monetarily, but we know that there was a great spiritual breaking in the process of the weekend. And there's no way God would've given us all the help He did if He wasn't fighting for it too.
Eating from the Tree of Life is acknowledging God is doing something bigger than you. It's hard to look at it this way, for sure, but if you can adjust your mindset just a bit, great things are happening under the surface.
Sunday, July 10, 2011
Learning
This morning, in worship, I held Judah, my youngest son (now 16 months) as I sang and danced. In the midst of enjoying the service, I noticed that he was enjoying the service too -- his precious little voice lala-ing along with the music, waving a flag and bestowing slobbery kisses (he is just learning how to kiss) onto my cheeks and face.
As I loved on him and he loved on me, I smiled thinking about how precious his childhood was. He didn't know how to sing, how to dance, or how to kiss -- but there he was singing, dancing and kissing his heart out.
God spoke to me and said that we are like my son, and God is our parent. This analogy is used all the time, but it wasn't how we usually think. Today, God pointed out to me how inexperienced we are, how naive, how we don't know how to do things. And God, our Father, thinks our childhood is precious.
I remember learning how to dance when I was 17. I was raised in a church that didn't clap, raise their hands, and NEVER moved into the isle (unless they were discreetly walking out of the service for some reason or another). Through a long course of changes in my life and walk with God, He has taught me how to dance and be free in worship. But the first time I consciously had to make the effort to be free and dance was tough. It wasn't the first time I'd ever danced - there had been a time before that when I was anointed and pretty well overtaken by what God was doing (like being slain in the Spirit I guess, but backwards because I was moving.... anyway). But the first time I had to stand up and make myself start dancing was really tough. I over thought it, I wanted to make sure I was doing it right, I was so worried that God (and everyone else) would think I was an idiot. And somehow, 7 years later, its as natural as breathing. God moves, and I move with Him. Its normal.
Its things like this that I am talking about. Dancing, kissing, walking, singing - these things are things we learn how to do. Some of us are better than others at certain things - but we all had to learn how to do what we do. And God rejoices in the process of watching us learn how to do what we do.
There will be things that you learn to do (and have already learned to do) that don't come naturally, but they are things we learn to do, want to do, need to do to have a fulfilling relationship with God. And in the process of learning how to do them, remember that God rejoices in the process and loves on you as you learn how to love on Him.
As I loved on him and he loved on me, I smiled thinking about how precious his childhood was. He didn't know how to sing, how to dance, or how to kiss -- but there he was singing, dancing and kissing his heart out.
God spoke to me and said that we are like my son, and God is our parent. This analogy is used all the time, but it wasn't how we usually think. Today, God pointed out to me how inexperienced we are, how naive, how we don't know how to do things. And God, our Father, thinks our childhood is precious.
I remember learning how to dance when I was 17. I was raised in a church that didn't clap, raise their hands, and NEVER moved into the isle (unless they were discreetly walking out of the service for some reason or another). Through a long course of changes in my life and walk with God, He has taught me how to dance and be free in worship. But the first time I consciously had to make the effort to be free and dance was tough. It wasn't the first time I'd ever danced - there had been a time before that when I was anointed and pretty well overtaken by what God was doing (like being slain in the Spirit I guess, but backwards because I was moving.... anyway). But the first time I had to stand up and make myself start dancing was really tough. I over thought it, I wanted to make sure I was doing it right, I was so worried that God (and everyone else) would think I was an idiot. And somehow, 7 years later, its as natural as breathing. God moves, and I move with Him. Its normal.
Its things like this that I am talking about. Dancing, kissing, walking, singing - these things are things we learn how to do. Some of us are better than others at certain things - but we all had to learn how to do what we do. And God rejoices in the process of watching us learn how to do what we do.
There will be things that you learn to do (and have already learned to do) that don't come naturally, but they are things we learn to do, want to do, need to do to have a fulfilling relationship with God. And in the process of learning how to do them, remember that God rejoices in the process and loves on you as you learn how to love on Him.
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Do it Yourself
I have always considered myself as a pretty big "do it yourself" type. I (try) to do my own yardwork, I do my own cleaning, Brent and I install or fix our own appliances, I assemble my own new furniture, etc. In my years of assembling/fixing/repairing/etc I have discovered the importance of having the right tools to use in the process.
Example: Today, I am assembling a new desk and rolling wooden file cabinet that belongs beneath it. Now, it is entirely possible and I am doing just fine with my old school screwdriver but as I pour sweat and elbow grease into this project, it keeps recurring in my mind how I wish I had a power drill with a magnetic tip so I could just stick the screws to the tip and drive them right into the wood.
Also, a few months ago I installed a new bolt lock on my front door. Living in a manufactured home, I am aware of the shortcuts the carpenters used in the process of making my home. One such frustrating shortcut is that my door frame isn't built for the regular bolt lock, it had a cheap one used only for trailers and manufactured homes installed. So, to put in a new one I had to carve out the appropriate amount of my door frame to get the one I bought at Lowes to fit. I did it with a flathead screwdriver and a hammer, chiseling a bit at a time until I had a rough fit. Would a jigsaw been a better tool? Absolutely.
The point that I'm getting at is that we can live our lives and do whatever it is that we need to do to accomplish that which God has in store for us. However, fulfilling your destiny and living to fullness is MUCH easier with the right tools. Surrounding yourselves with a church body, having friends to keep you accountable, and evenly-yoked spouse (someone walking the same walk, the same direction that you are - not just a Christian), proper environments, etc -- all these things are not required for fulfilling your destiny but let me assure you they will make it EASIER.
I think that is the point of the law in the Old Testament, and the guidelines in the New Testament for Christians. Now, following the death and ressurection of Christ, living according to these guidelines isn't a must-- its not a do or die necessity - but using the right tools, following the right lifestyle, will make fulfilling your destiny much easier. Its simple - if you want to be productive (and do what you were made to do) things like being drunk, sleeping around, etc, will only make being what you're made to be more difficult.
Its not that you can't use a regular screwdriver to put together that desk, it just will be harder and more time consuming that way.
Example: Today, I am assembling a new desk and rolling wooden file cabinet that belongs beneath it. Now, it is entirely possible and I am doing just fine with my old school screwdriver but as I pour sweat and elbow grease into this project, it keeps recurring in my mind how I wish I had a power drill with a magnetic tip so I could just stick the screws to the tip and drive them right into the wood.
Also, a few months ago I installed a new bolt lock on my front door. Living in a manufactured home, I am aware of the shortcuts the carpenters used in the process of making my home. One such frustrating shortcut is that my door frame isn't built for the regular bolt lock, it had a cheap one used only for trailers and manufactured homes installed. So, to put in a new one I had to carve out the appropriate amount of my door frame to get the one I bought at Lowes to fit. I did it with a flathead screwdriver and a hammer, chiseling a bit at a time until I had a rough fit. Would a jigsaw been a better tool? Absolutely.
The point that I'm getting at is that we can live our lives and do whatever it is that we need to do to accomplish that which God has in store for us. However, fulfilling your destiny and living to fullness is MUCH easier with the right tools. Surrounding yourselves with a church body, having friends to keep you accountable, and evenly-yoked spouse (someone walking the same walk, the same direction that you are - not just a Christian), proper environments, etc -- all these things are not required for fulfilling your destiny but let me assure you they will make it EASIER.
I think that is the point of the law in the Old Testament, and the guidelines in the New Testament for Christians. Now, following the death and ressurection of Christ, living according to these guidelines isn't a must-- its not a do or die necessity - but using the right tools, following the right lifestyle, will make fulfilling your destiny much easier. Its simple - if you want to be productive (and do what you were made to do) things like being drunk, sleeping around, etc, will only make being what you're made to be more difficult.
Its not that you can't use a regular screwdriver to put together that desk, it just will be harder and more time consuming that way.
Sunday, May 8, 2011
Justice
Jesus came to free us from the law. He gave us 2 commands, and only 2. Love God, love men. The end. And somehow, we come up with all kinds of other things to go along with it; don't smoke, don't drink, don't sleep around, don't do drugs, don't cuss, etc. And I feel God screaming at us "THAT DOESN'T REALLY MATTER!!"
The thing is that God came to show us He loves us enough to do away with the rules. God loves us enough to send Jesus to die to make the rules not apply to us. And He gives us ideas, guidelines - things to make our lives a little bit easier, but its not a new law - they aren't rules. We get so caught up in our own ideas of Good and Evil that we want to label everything as one or the other. We are so uncomfortable with "gray areas". We so are American (justice for all) that we get caught up in the ideas of fair and equality and we miss the point.
Fact is, God isn't fair. Some of us are called to die martyrs. Some of us are called to live dirt poor. Some of us are called to live as widows, childless or orphans. And you know what? That isn't fair at all. But God isn't about fair. He's about your best interest - the best thing for you and how to bring you to your full potential. Jesus' death was about doing away with the law - and therefore the rules and justice. So its not about being fair anymore - thank God!!! Fairness is getting what you deserve. I deserve a bunch of BAD stuff and so do you!
So next time you look at someone and say "that's wrong" or "that's right" stop and think about it. God loves them regardless of what they are doing. And thank God He loves you regardless of what you do. Its not our place to pass judgement on whats right or wrong. Its not always sin that brings death, its our own minds that decide on our own whats good or bad. Its time we stopped making up our own laws to replace the one God did away with. Its time to start living in the new kingdom, in the new fullness of life and stop worrying about right/wrong, fair/unfair, just/unjust.
The thing is that God came to show us He loves us enough to do away with the rules. God loves us enough to send Jesus to die to make the rules not apply to us. And He gives us ideas, guidelines - things to make our lives a little bit easier, but its not a new law - they aren't rules. We get so caught up in our own ideas of Good and Evil that we want to label everything as one or the other. We are so uncomfortable with "gray areas". We so are American (justice for all) that we get caught up in the ideas of fair and equality and we miss the point.
Fact is, God isn't fair. Some of us are called to die martyrs. Some of us are called to live dirt poor. Some of us are called to live as widows, childless or orphans. And you know what? That isn't fair at all. But God isn't about fair. He's about your best interest - the best thing for you and how to bring you to your full potential. Jesus' death was about doing away with the law - and therefore the rules and justice. So its not about being fair anymore - thank God!!! Fairness is getting what you deserve. I deserve a bunch of BAD stuff and so do you!
So next time you look at someone and say "that's wrong" or "that's right" stop and think about it. God loves them regardless of what they are doing. And thank God He loves you regardless of what you do. Its not our place to pass judgement on whats right or wrong. Its not always sin that brings death, its our own minds that decide on our own whats good or bad. Its time we stopped making up our own laws to replace the one God did away with. Its time to start living in the new kingdom, in the new fullness of life and stop worrying about right/wrong, fair/unfair, just/unjust.
Thursday, April 28, 2011
Collateral Damage
In the wake of arguably one of the biggest storms (for us) in over 20 years, people ask questions. Why did this happen? Where was God when this storm came? What was He doing, doesn't He love us? And while we watch the newscasts in terror, realizing the lives lost, we wonder.
If you're like me, my stomach clenches and turns when I hear about the lives lost... the children they're pulling out of the ditches in Ringgold, the death toll steadily rising... And something inside of me screams out "NO! This isn't RIGHT!"
I think its important to acknowledge a few things...
First off - What happens in the wake of a tragedy is beautiful. I have had my phone lighting up all day. People I haven't heard from in years (literally) called me, texted or Facebooked this morning to check and see how I was. I found myself doing the same - calling people in the area to check on them, make sure they were all right. People reach out beyond themselves and compassion shows up in a big way. They give, they volunteer, they open shelters and provide food -- they take care of people who need it. People stop being so selfish and - for a day or so - honestly inquire about the needs and well being of others.
Secondly - We thank God it missed us. Or, we thank God for the help that's been given since it hit us. Whatever. We acknowledge the One who is in control. We accept that Someone bigger than us is at work in the universe. Things like this serve me with a wake up call. "Hello? Do you realize you were 5 miles down the road from the worst of it?" "Wow, God, you're awesome. Thanks for protecting us!"
So - The question at hand is "Does God love you?"
The pre-programed answer is "yes, of course." We're taught that as small as we can learn to sing the song "yes, Jesus loves me." But let me ask you - Do you REALLY believe that God loves you? Is it past your brain and down in your gut?
If the answer to that is yes, you already know what God is doing, or at least that what He's doing is good. That doesn't mean its easy or makes sense, it just means that you know.
If you can't answer that... Honestly? that's okay. It takes time to really know what you believe about God. When I was 16 - even after I'd been raised in the church my whole life and had firmly rooted belief about God - I found myself realizing that God was not who I thought He was. I'd been taught that God is judgmental since He is perfect and can't bear sin. And basically that Jesus saved the day and saved us from eternal damnation that the Father was going to put on us. And while, more or less, some of that is true I entirely missed the real nature of God. God - Father, Son and Holy Spirit - loves you. God wants the best for you. And in spite of what anyone says (ex: this is punishment for your sin, this is what you deserve, whatever) God doesn't want death and pain for us.
In line with my belief about God and what I know of His personality, I attest that God did not cause the tornadoes, but rather, allowed them to happen in order to let His good come out of all of it. But let me ask you -- if God did cause the tornadoes, do you really believe anything changes? Does God not love you because he uses natural disasters to change things? This is a good opportunity to really examine yourself and ask yourself -- Does God really love me?
Saturday, April 2, 2011
Recovering
what is it about pain that draws people together, that brings us to relating to one another? At a business lunch today, as my boss spoke about living in a different country from his spouse while their kids were attending school, it became apparent that it was somewhat difficult for him. Its not that he was being overly transparent - it was just a fact - he missed his wife. And as he shared, our business client responded that he knew how hard that could be because he lived on the west coast for 6 months while his wife was over here.
Something inside of us calls out to one another to be understood. We want to know we aren't the only ones. That we aren't alone in our feeling or our pain.
How easy it is to forget that Jesus felt all of our pains! the bible is so clear about how Jesus was completely human.
And yet even as I type that theres something inside that checks me and says "well Jesus never experienced such and such -- how could he know your pain?" And typing it all out for the world to see, its so much easier to call that a lie of the devil, but when its in your own mind it isn't that easy. So Jesus wasn't anorexic, an alcoholic, or suicidal. He wasn't addicted to crack, he wasn't alot of things according to what we know of him. And somehow he took on the weight of the world and experienced all of it in a supernatural way.
I believe that's why we have the church today. Somehow I think God knew that we wouldn't believe that Jesus felt all that we feel. And somehow I think He knew that wouldn't be enough to just write it in a book for those of us thousands of years later. We want to relate. And so he gives us other people to relate to and share our experiences with, if we'll be vulnerable enough to do it. I don't think He's angry over that, either, God is intelligent enough to acknowledge our shortcomings and compensate.
Will you be brave enough to share your pains with someone so you can bond and grow? You can't recover from some illnesses until you tell the doctor that you're sick. In the same way, you can't recover from pain until you tell someone what happened to you and why it hurts you.
Something inside of us calls out to one another to be understood. We want to know we aren't the only ones. That we aren't alone in our feeling or our pain.
How easy it is to forget that Jesus felt all of our pains! the bible is so clear about how Jesus was completely human.
And yet even as I type that theres something inside that checks me and says "well Jesus never experienced such and such -- how could he know your pain?" And typing it all out for the world to see, its so much easier to call that a lie of the devil, but when its in your own mind it isn't that easy. So Jesus wasn't anorexic, an alcoholic, or suicidal. He wasn't addicted to crack, he wasn't alot of things according to what we know of him. And somehow he took on the weight of the world and experienced all of it in a supernatural way.
I believe that's why we have the church today. Somehow I think God knew that we wouldn't believe that Jesus felt all that we feel. And somehow I think He knew that wouldn't be enough to just write it in a book for those of us thousands of years later. We want to relate. And so he gives us other people to relate to and share our experiences with, if we'll be vulnerable enough to do it. I don't think He's angry over that, either, God is intelligent enough to acknowledge our shortcomings and compensate.
Will you be brave enough to share your pains with someone so you can bond and grow? You can't recover from some illnesses until you tell the doctor that you're sick. In the same way, you can't recover from pain until you tell someone what happened to you and why it hurts you.
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Survival Instinct
Pain is much like childbirth. Now, my experiences with childbirth have all been natural, so I'm not really sure what its like when you have medication. Anyway,
When you are in labor, the point right before you are allowed to start pushing is the most painful that labor gets. The combination of pressure and pain is overwhelming. Your body takes over and you have to let your mind and emotions slip back into a coma-like state for a short period just to make it through. You fully believe you are going to die, that something's gone wrong, that you are never going to deliver this baby -- because it hurts so much. And your body kicks in and pushes your brain back and focuses your energy on bringing that baby into the world. There is something that changes in a woman during that much pain -- its hard to describe as anything other than a survival instinct. Basically, your body knows that to live it has to deliver this baby. And if you don't, you and that baby will possibly die. And it takes over and does what it needs to do.
A similar picture would be instances in movies that are repeated by action films and dramas alike. There is a point that you fully believe that the hero is going to die. He's taken a few gunshots, he is bleeding profusely, he can hardly stand and he's holding his guts in with his free hand. The hero slides across the floor as the villan laughs, about to kill his (best friend, daughter, wife, whatever) and the camera angle shifts and suddenly you see that hero stand up and shoot the villan. The villan dies and the hero falls over and passes out from the sheer effort. Its a survival instinct - its that thing inside you that says "if I don't do this, we're all gonna die." It surpasses your pain and your ability and taps into a hidden reserve just long enough to get it done.
Pain is something we all face. Alot of situations get worse and worse until we just can't stand it anymore and we're doing all we can do to get up in the morning and remember to take a shower or feed the dog before we leave for work. Things slip - you forget to haul off the trash, you forget to pay the bills, you don't have the energy to mow the lawn - but you're doing your absolute best because life is so much, so painful, that you've tapped into that hidden reserve to make it through until things get better. You're surviving.
God gave us that hidden reserve and that ability to distance ourselves as a protective mechanism from occasional things that happen that really are just too much. But many times we stay in survival mode and we never step back into the fullness that life is meant to be. You make plenty of money at your new job but you're still always stressed out that last few days before payday. You're out of that bad relationship but it still frightens you when you pass a car like the one he drives. You are stuck surviving because that's what you've been doing for so long. You go to church on Sunday morning and pray for Christ to return soon because you don't know how much longer you can take all this corruption in the school system.
God wants us to remember that life isn't about surviving. We are warriors. And sometimes, warriors survive. But warriors that only survive aren't called warriors -- they're called survivors. Warriors go out against the battle and fight back. So your financial life is upside down - actively look for a resolution, don't lie down and cry about it. Your out of a bad relationship - good! Move on! You hate the teacher that told your child God was a myth for old fogies -- tell them that you don't want them instilling those teachings in your child and change teachers or schools if needbe!
Don't just survive -- Go out there and take back our territory!
When you are in labor, the point right before you are allowed to start pushing is the most painful that labor gets. The combination of pressure and pain is overwhelming. Your body takes over and you have to let your mind and emotions slip back into a coma-like state for a short period just to make it through. You fully believe you are going to die, that something's gone wrong, that you are never going to deliver this baby -- because it hurts so much. And your body kicks in and pushes your brain back and focuses your energy on bringing that baby into the world. There is something that changes in a woman during that much pain -- its hard to describe as anything other than a survival instinct. Basically, your body knows that to live it has to deliver this baby. And if you don't, you and that baby will possibly die. And it takes over and does what it needs to do.
A similar picture would be instances in movies that are repeated by action films and dramas alike. There is a point that you fully believe that the hero is going to die. He's taken a few gunshots, he is bleeding profusely, he can hardly stand and he's holding his guts in with his free hand. The hero slides across the floor as the villan laughs, about to kill his (best friend, daughter, wife, whatever) and the camera angle shifts and suddenly you see that hero stand up and shoot the villan. The villan dies and the hero falls over and passes out from the sheer effort. Its a survival instinct - its that thing inside you that says "if I don't do this, we're all gonna die." It surpasses your pain and your ability and taps into a hidden reserve just long enough to get it done.
Pain is something we all face. Alot of situations get worse and worse until we just can't stand it anymore and we're doing all we can do to get up in the morning and remember to take a shower or feed the dog before we leave for work. Things slip - you forget to haul off the trash, you forget to pay the bills, you don't have the energy to mow the lawn - but you're doing your absolute best because life is so much, so painful, that you've tapped into that hidden reserve to make it through until things get better. You're surviving.
God gave us that hidden reserve and that ability to distance ourselves as a protective mechanism from occasional things that happen that really are just too much. But many times we stay in survival mode and we never step back into the fullness that life is meant to be. You make plenty of money at your new job but you're still always stressed out that last few days before payday. You're out of that bad relationship but it still frightens you when you pass a car like the one he drives. You are stuck surviving because that's what you've been doing for so long. You go to church on Sunday morning and pray for Christ to return soon because you don't know how much longer you can take all this corruption in the school system.
God wants us to remember that life isn't about surviving. We are warriors. And sometimes, warriors survive. But warriors that only survive aren't called warriors -- they're called survivors. Warriors go out against the battle and fight back. So your financial life is upside down - actively look for a resolution, don't lie down and cry about it. Your out of a bad relationship - good! Move on! You hate the teacher that told your child God was a myth for old fogies -- tell them that you don't want them instilling those teachings in your child and change teachers or schools if needbe!
Don't just survive -- Go out there and take back our territory!
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
Past Pain
Every now and then something pops to the surface from deep within and you step back and say "wow. I didn't realize that still hurt so much." Tonight I had one of those instances.
My parents didn't like my choice of a husband and did everything in their influence and power to prevent our marriage down to the day of the wedding. It was a nasty fight for a while which even caused my relationship with my parents to be completely non-existent for a solid 4 months post-wedding. When my brother got married (4 years after Brent and I) to a wonderful woman whom we all love, my parents made a big to-do over giving their blessing to the happy couple. And in the process realized they'd never given their verbal blessing to our marriage and gave it over dinner the night before my brother's rehearsal dinner.
Tonight as I chatted with my sister in law about various things, this rose to the surface, rearing its ugly head as un-resolved hurts. How could they be so mean as to never give us their blessing until they felt bad about it? How could they be that disappointed in someone who makes me so happy? What's the deal with that? And although they've apologized for it taking so long, I still have some healing to do.
Its like this cut that I have on my arm. I bumped into the corner of a desk and scraped a pretty deep little cut into my forearm. Now initially, it hurt and I put a bandage over it to protect myself. Over time it healed up some, but there was a scab on it that (at some point) got ripped off by brushing into something. While the scab needs to come off eventually for the healing to finish, that can really hurt.
Sometimes when God is helping you heal from something, it hurts. Sometimes you don't even realize you haven't finished healing until you have that scab removed and you suddenly hurt again.
And then, after the pain subsides some, theres a scar.
Because lets face it. Just because its not bleeding, and just because the pain is a faint memory down the road of life doesn't mean it didn't happen. You still see that scar from time to time and remember the way you got it and do your best to avoid the situation in future.
For instance, when I was 15 (I'm 24 now) I went surfing with some friends. I hadn't been surfing in this strip of beach before and the undertow (current) was very strong that day. A big gush of wind came and we were swept down the beach and into the pier. Now, at home the piers are big and tall, built on top of huge pillars. Down in the water the pillars are covered with oysters and clams and other shelled creatures. In the midst of trying to get to shore and staying above water and not drowning, my legs were cut to pieces on the shells attached to these pillars. To this day I still have the scars on the backs of my knees.
That was a long time ago. My legs healed up and I went back to life 9 years ago. But today I still remember who I was with, what I was wearing, and where we were.
Just because we are called to forgive those who do wrong against us doesn't mean we are expected to forget what happened. When someone wrongs you, don't hold it over their heads and hate them forever, but be intelligent about it. I think people mis-understand what Jesus meant when he said to turn the other cheek and to pray for those who persecute you. He didn't say to forget that they slapped you. He just says to love them anyway.
My parents didn't like my choice of a husband and did everything in their influence and power to prevent our marriage down to the day of the wedding. It was a nasty fight for a while which even caused my relationship with my parents to be completely non-existent for a solid 4 months post-wedding. When my brother got married (4 years after Brent and I) to a wonderful woman whom we all love, my parents made a big to-do over giving their blessing to the happy couple. And in the process realized they'd never given their verbal blessing to our marriage and gave it over dinner the night before my brother's rehearsal dinner.
Tonight as I chatted with my sister in law about various things, this rose to the surface, rearing its ugly head as un-resolved hurts. How could they be so mean as to never give us their blessing until they felt bad about it? How could they be that disappointed in someone who makes me so happy? What's the deal with that? And although they've apologized for it taking so long, I still have some healing to do.
Its like this cut that I have on my arm. I bumped into the corner of a desk and scraped a pretty deep little cut into my forearm. Now initially, it hurt and I put a bandage over it to protect myself. Over time it healed up some, but there was a scab on it that (at some point) got ripped off by brushing into something. While the scab needs to come off eventually for the healing to finish, that can really hurt.
Sometimes when God is helping you heal from something, it hurts. Sometimes you don't even realize you haven't finished healing until you have that scab removed and you suddenly hurt again.
And then, after the pain subsides some, theres a scar.
Because lets face it. Just because its not bleeding, and just because the pain is a faint memory down the road of life doesn't mean it didn't happen. You still see that scar from time to time and remember the way you got it and do your best to avoid the situation in future.
For instance, when I was 15 (I'm 24 now) I went surfing with some friends. I hadn't been surfing in this strip of beach before and the undertow (current) was very strong that day. A big gush of wind came and we were swept down the beach and into the pier. Now, at home the piers are big and tall, built on top of huge pillars. Down in the water the pillars are covered with oysters and clams and other shelled creatures. In the midst of trying to get to shore and staying above water and not drowning, my legs were cut to pieces on the shells attached to these pillars. To this day I still have the scars on the backs of my knees.
That was a long time ago. My legs healed up and I went back to life 9 years ago. But today I still remember who I was with, what I was wearing, and where we were.
Just because we are called to forgive those who do wrong against us doesn't mean we are expected to forget what happened. When someone wrongs you, don't hold it over their heads and hate them forever, but be intelligent about it. I think people mis-understand what Jesus meant when he said to turn the other cheek and to pray for those who persecute you. He didn't say to forget that they slapped you. He just says to love them anyway.
Monday, March 21, 2011
CrossRoads
Everyone has come to a point at one time or another when they have to make a decision. A crossroads. A potentially life-changing choice. Most people don't consider the fact that your decision has already been made. Freewill vs. Predestinaton has been one of the longest standing debates as far as Christianity is concerned. But honestly, regardless of the side you stand on - be it that your decision has already been made and you're destined to make it, or that you are totally in control of your own destiny - or anywhere in between - God works all things together for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose (that means you!) and God is all-knowing and is not bound by time (so He's in the past and present and future and has already seen what you're gonna do)
The reason I bring all this confusing predestination and omnipotence to the topic of conversation is to bring you a beacon of light and peace when you have to make a decision. We hold these truths to our hearts and maybe we can keep our heads while we make huge decisions (or even just the little ones)
1) God has plans for you (good plans, I promise!). God is all powerful, all knowing, and has your best at heart. Regardless of how you want to screw up your own life, God will work it out in the end. So even if you choose "wrong" God is already in that decision and is already walking through that with you to restore it to your full potential
2) God has one of these decisions that He favors. There is a "right" thing to do in every situation. The trick is seeing God - seeing what He wants and where He wants you. Its not that your doomed if you don't choose right - but these type things are important in the long run and if you follow God's first choice, things will be much easier.
Lets consider Jonah: ok its pretty much an aknowledged
fact that Jonah chose wrong. God said go to Ninevah,
Jonah went to Tarshish. However you want to break it
all down with the technical stuff the fact is that
God's first choice was for Jonah to obey. But since
Jonah didn't obey from the get-go, God used the story
of a Whale to teach both Jonah and us that God forgives
us and meets us where we are - that God makes
everything work out.
3) God will make it evident to you what the thing to do is. He isn't some mean badguy waiting up there with lightning bolts to zap you if you pick wrong. Seek first the Kingdom of God and all these things will be added to you!!
So suck it up, pray hard, and make your choice with confidence in the fact that yours steps are being guided
Saturday, March 12, 2011
Sickness
This weekend, my oldest and youngest are battling a tummy flu. Alina (4 years) is throwing up pretty regularly and the baby (Judah) has had gut wrenching tummy aches causing him to writhe and scream quite a bit. And the strange thing that occurs to me? (thanks, God, some sense of humor!) Alina's puke is not so gross!! Ok just go with me on this one.
Something about caring for sick people is different than seeing the byproduct of illness apart from the one who is sick. If you simply step in a pile of throw-up, you are disgusted. If you see a child or person you love who is throwing up its different. You aren't concerned with the smell or sight of what's happening, you are drawn to how you can help, what can you do to make them feel better? Do you want something to drink? Can i get you a fresh t-shirt? Let me wash that.
It occurs to me in this that God feels similarly about us. Picture our sins - even the "big bad" ones as vomit. God is disgusted by homosexuality, murder, lying, even leaving out the truth. God thinks it looks and smells nasty and wants nothing to do with it. But when he looks at us, sick with those very things, those are no longer his concern. He is no longer caught up in how he feels about it, but simply how He can love on us, how He can make us feel better.
I've heard all kinds of analogies about sin but I think this is the simplest way to put it. Its not that we like puke, its that we love the person who is puking.
Something about caring for sick people is different than seeing the byproduct of illness apart from the one who is sick. If you simply step in a pile of throw-up, you are disgusted. If you see a child or person you love who is throwing up its different. You aren't concerned with the smell or sight of what's happening, you are drawn to how you can help, what can you do to make them feel better? Do you want something to drink? Can i get you a fresh t-shirt? Let me wash that.
It occurs to me in this that God feels similarly about us. Picture our sins - even the "big bad" ones as vomit. God is disgusted by homosexuality, murder, lying, even leaving out the truth. God thinks it looks and smells nasty and wants nothing to do with it. But when he looks at us, sick with those very things, those are no longer his concern. He is no longer caught up in how he feels about it, but simply how He can love on us, how He can make us feel better.
I've heard all kinds of analogies about sin but I think this is the simplest way to put it. Its not that we like puke, its that we love the person who is puking.
Thursday, February 17, 2011
Cry it Out
Something about teaching Judah to go to bed in his own bed has struck a chord within me. I wonder about how often we get into situations that God has to let us "cry it out"
The cry it out method is a method parents use when they've tried all the nice ways to put their kid down to bed (something he needs) and none of the easy ways worked. This method is generally a last resort for parents - its not what you want to do but your precious little one has just taxed the daylights out of your right mind. You don't know what else to try. He just has to cry it out and go to sleep.
As a parent of 3 children, I know this method works but its really a tough thing to do. In the process of teaching your child how to go to sleep, if you're like me, you turn the music up in the other room and put your head under a pillow, or you step outside just so you don't go and pick up the little one. He'll never learn to sleep on his own if he knows you'll come and get him if he cries hard and long enough.
Its not that you don't love your baby. Its not that you aren't worried about him, listening to make sure he isn't actually in need of something. In fact, part of the method involves making sure all his needs are met before you put him down. But there comes a time and a place that you just have to grind your teeth and suck it up and put that baby down.
God is illustrated as a Father again and again throughout the bible. And tonight, as I struggle to discipline my children in love, I wonder about how many times He has to let me cry it out.
Sunday, February 13, 2011
War Heros
You have to fight alot of battles to be a war hero.
Think about it.
Seems obvious.
But we want to wake up one day and just be famous - be the guy that changed the world, be the woman on the cover of the NY Times for doing something spectacular for the kingdom. We want to change the world but we don't want to do the time in the war to earn the respect needed to make the changes we want to see.
"Be the change you want to see in the world" - Ghandi
"You are the light of the world." - Jesus
Remember this when life sucks. When its been 5 weeks without a car. When your boss won't fire the person you can't stand to work with. When you do the job someone else gets paid to do every day but they won't promote you. When you wake up a 3 o'clock in the morning with the kids screaming. When your broke and 3 months behind on your house payment. When your lonely at night wishing your spouse didn't work night shift. They're all little battles on the way to winning the war.
Steven Spielberg is an American film director. He has won several Academy Awards an ranks among the most successful filmmakers in history. Most of all, Steven was recognized as the financially most successful motion picture director of all time. During his childhood, Spielberg dropped out of junior high school. He was persuaded to come back and was placed in a learning-disabled class. He only lasted a month and then dropped out of school forever.
Albert Einstein was a theoretical physicist widely regarded as the most important scientist of the 20th century. He was awarded the 1921 Nobel Prize for Physics for his explanation of the photoelectric effect in 1905 and "for his services to Theoretical Physics". However, when Einstein was young, his parents thought he was mentally retarded. His grades in school were so poor that a teacher asked him to quit, saying, "Einstein, you will never amount to anything!"
Isaac Newton was the greatest English mathematician of his generation. His work on optics and gravitation made him one of the greatest scientists the world has even known. Many thought that Isaac was born a genius, but he wasn't! When he was young, he did very poorly in grade school, so poor that his teachers became clueless in improving his grades.
In 1947, one year into her contract, Marilyn Monroe was dropped by 20th Century-Fox because her producer thought she was unattractive and cannot act. That didn't deter her at all! She kept on going and eventually she was recognized by the public as the 20th century's most famous movie star, sex symbol and pop icon.
"Your greatest anointing is usually where you'll fight the hardest." - Craig Cooper
3 Kinds of Kid
This morning at church I dropped my two boys off in the nursery for the sermon. As I left them playing happily, God spoke to me.
There are 3 kinds of kids in this world.
Child #1 is a kid who doesn't care that his parents has left them. They are independent, adventurous, and ready to take on whatever is coming. Its not that they don't need their parent, its that they trust their parent so completely that they believe wholeheartedly that if their Mommy chose to leave them somewhere then they must be safe. They get their hugs and kisses and then go play with the toys and the other children, happy as can be.
Child #2 is the less-adjusted child that screams at the top of his blessed lungs the entire time that their parent is absent. Usually this child is the visitor at church - he isn't familiar with the faces who are there to care for him. Sometimes they are people he knows but he'd rather be with his Daddy. This child cries so long and loud that you're pretty sure the preacher can even hear him. As soon as their parent returns and he is back in their arms, this child finds some peace and the storm calms to some whimpering.
Child #3 is the distracted one. For a moment, there is nothing in the world worse than the fact that Mommy or Daddy just left him in the nursery. But after about 3 or 4 minutes, he becomes preoccupied with the flashing lights or funny noises the toy given to him is making. He doesn't notice their absence at all until they re-appear and then he's ready to go back to them instantly.
In Romans (3:15-16) God talks about the church and makes it very clear that He favors extremes. He says "I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other!"
God does not want us to be distractable. He wants us to either be independent and trust the process and go and do what he wants us to do - or else cry and cling to him for dear life. Obviously the first is the preferable choice - but if you aren't in a place to just go do what He said to do, then cling for dear life because He wants us to be one or the other - not on the fence about it!
There are 3 kinds of kids in this world.
Child #1 is a kid who doesn't care that his parents has left them. They are independent, adventurous, and ready to take on whatever is coming. Its not that they don't need their parent, its that they trust their parent so completely that they believe wholeheartedly that if their Mommy chose to leave them somewhere then they must be safe. They get their hugs and kisses and then go play with the toys and the other children, happy as can be.
Child #2 is the less-adjusted child that screams at the top of his blessed lungs the entire time that their parent is absent. Usually this child is the visitor at church - he isn't familiar with the faces who are there to care for him. Sometimes they are people he knows but he'd rather be with his Daddy. This child cries so long and loud that you're pretty sure the preacher can even hear him. As soon as their parent returns and he is back in their arms, this child finds some peace and the storm calms to some whimpering.
Child #3 is the distracted one. For a moment, there is nothing in the world worse than the fact that Mommy or Daddy just left him in the nursery. But after about 3 or 4 minutes, he becomes preoccupied with the flashing lights or funny noises the toy given to him is making. He doesn't notice their absence at all until they re-appear and then he's ready to go back to them instantly.
In Romans (3:15-16) God talks about the church and makes it very clear that He favors extremes. He says "I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other!"
God does not want us to be distractable. He wants us to either be independent and trust the process and go and do what he wants us to do - or else cry and cling to him for dear life. Obviously the first is the preferable choice - but if you aren't in a place to just go do what He said to do, then cling for dear life because He wants us to be one or the other - not on the fence about it!
Saturday, February 5, 2011
Place of Pain
Sometimes I feel like David (from the Bible). I do everything I can to do what I'm supposed to and even if I beat the giant, I've got other, bigger problems to deal with once that's over with. Its times that I get discouraged that I sit and read the Psalms. Today, Psalm 84 is what popped up on Google when I went looking for encouragement (funny how God uses things like Google!) Sometimes the old language throws off the meaning for me so I re-write it in the spirit of what he was getting at. I felt I should share today.
How beautiful is your home, Lord Almighty. My soul longs, even though I may be tired and weary, to be in your presence. My heart and my body cry out for the living God. Even something as insignificant as a sparrow has a place, a nest where she can protect her little babies - a place close to you, Lord Almighty, My King and my God.
Those who live in your house, they are blessed. They are always thanking you. Those who depend on you for their strength, they are also blessed. Their hearts are set on an adventure. As they walk through the place of great pain and crying, they transform it to a place of hope. The driest parts become lush pools of life. They continue to hold on to your strength, determined to make it until they reach God in the fullness of heaven. Listen to me pleading, Lord God, and hear me. Look on the things I have protecting me with favor, and give a shield to the ones you have chosen.
Its better to be with you for one day than live a thousand days apart from you. I'd rather be a slave doing the dirtiest jobs You have than live with those who don't know You. You are the light of the day and my protection at night. You give me favor and honor. You don't hold back any blessings from those who walk without fault.
Lord Almighty, blessed is anyone who puts their trust in You.
Did you catch that part about the valley of pain (Valley of Baca)? David says "As they pass through the Valley of Baca, they make it a place of springs; the autumn rains also cover it with pools." He doesn't say that they just tough through the desert, or that God chooses to have mercy on their souls - it says THEY (as in the ones walking through it, the ones who turn to God for their strength) MAKE it a place of springs.
You -- not anyone else, not God, not your church leaders, not your spouse. YOU are the one who can make your place of greatest pain a place of life and hope.
How beautiful is your home, Lord Almighty. My soul longs, even though I may be tired and weary, to be in your presence. My heart and my body cry out for the living God. Even something as insignificant as a sparrow has a place, a nest where she can protect her little babies - a place close to you, Lord Almighty, My King and my God.
Those who live in your house, they are blessed. They are always thanking you. Those who depend on you for their strength, they are also blessed. Their hearts are set on an adventure. As they walk through the place of great pain and crying, they transform it to a place of hope. The driest parts become lush pools of life. They continue to hold on to your strength, determined to make it until they reach God in the fullness of heaven. Listen to me pleading, Lord God, and hear me. Look on the things I have protecting me with favor, and give a shield to the ones you have chosen.
Its better to be with you for one day than live a thousand days apart from you. I'd rather be a slave doing the dirtiest jobs You have than live with those who don't know You. You are the light of the day and my protection at night. You give me favor and honor. You don't hold back any blessings from those who walk without fault.
Lord Almighty, blessed is anyone who puts their trust in You.
Did you catch that part about the valley of pain (Valley of Baca)? David says "As they pass through the Valley of Baca, they make it a place of springs; the autumn rains also cover it with pools." He doesn't say that they just tough through the desert, or that God chooses to have mercy on their souls - it says THEY (as in the ones walking through it, the ones who turn to God for their strength) MAKE it a place of springs.
You -- not anyone else, not God, not your church leaders, not your spouse. YOU are the one who can make your place of greatest pain a place of life and hope.
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Are you Listening?
It's loud in a concert. One of my favorite memories as a teenager was an OC Supertones concert at a local (to where I lived) college. It was so loud - as many concerts are - that when they took a break your head was pounding and your ears were ringing.
Sometimes life is so loud that when it finally takes a break all we're left with is the ringing in our ears.
Are you so used to the circumstances that you don't hear the change? Are you so accustomed to the headbanging, did you miss the stillness?
He is a still, small voice.
Alot of times people only think of that as "still" as in a pond -- He leads us beside still waters. But, I think there is depth to the dual meaning that we have in English -- He is still -- still there, still waiting, still talking softly.
Listen -- the change has come.
Sometimes life is so loud that when it finally takes a break all we're left with is the ringing in our ears.
Are you so used to the circumstances that you don't hear the change? Are you so accustomed to the headbanging, did you miss the stillness?
He is a still, small voice.
Alot of times people only think of that as "still" as in a pond -- He leads us beside still waters. But, I think there is depth to the dual meaning that we have in English -- He is still -- still there, still waiting, still talking softly.
Listen -- the change has come.
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
control issues
Funny, I think I have a theme emerging lately. :-)
Sunday evening brought about 8-9" of snow to cohutta, forcing us to stay home, call into work til about Wednesday. It was terribly dangerous on the roads. When Brent got stuck on the way home Sunday night, it wasn't til 5pm the next evening that a tow truck got there (because they were so backed up.) There were four wheel drive trucks that got stuck out in it.
In the midst of it all, both of our cars were at the shop needing repair. It made me furious that our station wagon, which the mechanic has had for a while now, wasn't yet fixed, and even more upset when they couldn't get to our Suzuki til Wednesday. Tuesday night I sat in my bed, stewing in a bad mood. The roads had been scraped - even my street itself. But, no one was free to / willing to get me to work wednesday.
At this moment God spoke with a gentle reprimand." I gave you 2 extra days with your kids and Brent. I kept your water and power on. I have provided. Now let go."
If you are like me, you want control of every aspect of your situation. You have your plan and if something interferes you get angry. It's time we learned that things are GOING to interfere because God has better plans than we do. The longer we fight it the less time we have to enjoy the process.
Sunday evening brought about 8-9" of snow to cohutta, forcing us to stay home, call into work til about Wednesday. It was terribly dangerous on the roads. When Brent got stuck on the way home Sunday night, it wasn't til 5pm the next evening that a tow truck got there (because they were so backed up.) There were four wheel drive trucks that got stuck out in it.
In the midst of it all, both of our cars were at the shop needing repair. It made me furious that our station wagon, which the mechanic has had for a while now, wasn't yet fixed, and even more upset when they couldn't get to our Suzuki til Wednesday. Tuesday night I sat in my bed, stewing in a bad mood. The roads had been scraped - even my street itself. But, no one was free to / willing to get me to work wednesday.
At this moment God spoke with a gentle reprimand." I gave you 2 extra days with your kids and Brent. I kept your water and power on. I have provided. Now let go."
If you are like me, you want control of every aspect of your situation. You have your plan and if something interferes you get angry. It's time we learned that things are GOING to interfere because God has better plans than we do. The longer we fight it the less time we have to enjoy the process.
Sunday, January 9, 2011
our rights
Every so often, I have what I call a train track jump. This analogy was given me by Craig Cooper (our apostle) in a prophecy. Basically it means something is moving or breaking in the spiritual and my prophetic sense feels it, but my natural mind hasn't caught up yet. Tonight I had such a jump. As I looked through the church weekly email, I read the blog that Jori (a dear friend) wrote about why bad things happen and got majorly hung up on her statement that "God doesn't owe us" any answers. (which I am taking grossly out of context).
On the one hand, the side I know to be majorly religious and the way I was raised agrees. I know man is undeserving and sinful and truly bad, God being all holy and all knowing doesn't have to do or explain anything to us, as we are the creation and He is Creator. On the more liberal, freedom breathing side I hear myself screaming that God chose us to be coheirs and by that very act agreed to treat us like Christ and so we should have the right to know His reasons. And somewhere deep inside I realize that this isnt really about knowing why some unborn children die, but it is more about trusting God to love me enough to say I am good enough for Him to give His reasons to and I am good enough for Him to want to answer my questions.
So.
I know that as a fact but there is a hiccup in my spirit that conflicts with other parts of me. My spirit states with confidence that I am chosen, I am different, I am special. My soul contradicts that I am not the favorite, I am no one interesting, that I am a waste of time (all pains I carry from childhood). When I write it all down i know that my spirit is right but doubts linger. Am I really special enough to be gifted? Am I really different enough to change lives?
The answer is obviously yes, I have the capacities to be special and gifted but the reason most people never fufil their destiny as different and special is that they cant get past their own daddy issues to realize that God does trust us with His plan, we can change the world and yes we are special enough to be different.
On the one hand, the side I know to be majorly religious and the way I was raised agrees. I know man is undeserving and sinful and truly bad, God being all holy and all knowing doesn't have to do or explain anything to us, as we are the creation and He is Creator. On the more liberal, freedom breathing side I hear myself screaming that God chose us to be coheirs and by that very act agreed to treat us like Christ and so we should have the right to know His reasons. And somewhere deep inside I realize that this isnt really about knowing why some unborn children die, but it is more about trusting God to love me enough to say I am good enough for Him to give His reasons to and I am good enough for Him to want to answer my questions.
So.
I know that as a fact but there is a hiccup in my spirit that conflicts with other parts of me. My spirit states with confidence that I am chosen, I am different, I am special. My soul contradicts that I am not the favorite, I am no one interesting, that I am a waste of time (all pains I carry from childhood). When I write it all down i know that my spirit is right but doubts linger. Am I really special enough to be gifted? Am I really different enough to change lives?
The answer is obviously yes, I have the capacities to be special and gifted but the reason most people never fufil their destiny as different and special is that they cant get past their own daddy issues to realize that God does trust us with His plan, we can change the world and yes we are special enough to be different.
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